Sunday, April 29, 2012

Hummingbird





In Native American culture, a hummingbird symbolizes timeless joy and the Nectar of Life. It's a symbol for accomplishing that which seems impossible and will teach you how to find the miracle of joyful living from your own life circumstances.


As I do every week, I sat on Sweetie's bed when we had our Sunday evening phone call. Today, I had her window open, it was an absolutely gorgeous day. In front of her window is a beautiful rose bush, which is in full bloom right now. As we are talking I look out the window and see a hummingbird eating nectar from one of the blooms. I share this with Sweetie. She was really excited to hear this and she said that hummingbirds are a symbol of hope and she liked that...like this was meant to be. We had a wonderful hour and forty five minute conversation this evening. We started planning our trip down to visit her. She asked if she could have our last name because she didn't want hers. Cris and I talked to her about if she would like to choose a different middle name, she wants to because her middle name is her biological mothers name. She asked me if I was her biological child what would I name her? I thought about it for a bit and responded that I would name her Sweetie. She asked me what color my eyes were. She was happy to hear that they were light blue like hers. She said she did not remember what color her biological mothers eyes were. I asked her if talking about things like this was hard. And she admitted it was, but she liked to talk to me. We talked about Ms D, who is our attachment therapist. She is open to seeing her when she moves, which is great. That will help, since we are starting with her immediately! 
She must have said 10 times that she wishes we were visiting next weekend... so do I. Just 2 more Sunday evening conversations until we get to see her! As of right now we are planning a trip to a water park with her foster mother and foster brother. That will be a fun day!

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Making a Difference


I received the nicest email today! Someone in the Charlotte area stumbled upon my blog. She thanked me and shared how 6 people have been able to navigate their adoption journeys more efficiently because of it! 
That made my whole night! This is why I have documented everything, the ups and downs. Yay!

I met with Sweetie's Attachment Therapist tonight. She is amazing! For anyone who has adopted or is adopting, getting an Attachment Therapist is something I highly recommend. Especially if you are adopting from Foster Care. 

It's been a long day and I am beat, I just wanted to say Thank You to Lee Ann for the awesome letter! You made this girls night!


Sunday, April 22, 2012

What does a 12 year old like to do?


We had our weekly call with Sweetie this evening. It went well again. She had 2 test for Florida state standardized testing last week and has 2 more test this coming week. She said they were not hard. She is a very good student which is always nice. We set up our first visit for May 18th. Yay! We talked more about things she likes... when asked what her favorite thing to do, it was of course shopping! Cris is the bigger shopper out of the 2 of us. He was happy to hear that she liked to shop too! Cris was talking about his sunglasses and Sweetie mentioned she did not have any and That Ms. T had a pair of Jessica Simpson glasses that were pretty. Cris told her he would buy a pair for her. Her response was awesome.. She said that they were too expensive and she didn't want the pressure of owning something that nice. I can really appreciate that she knows the value of things and also she didn't take advantage of Cris' generosity. 

When we go to visit we are going to bring one of the dogs and I asked her which one she would like to meet first. I had thought for sure it would be Darling or Oakley, but she surprised me by saying Hunter. 
We got to see more of her personality on the phone. She is funny. But she is very cautious on what she says. If she says something she thinks is wrong she apologizes immediately. We will have to work on that.
It was so obvious on today's call that she wants a family so badly. She said that she was already starting to love us. I responded that we are going to love her back. I know that she is saying what she thinks we want to hear. I can imagine how scary this all must be to her. She tries to act all strong and fearless, but I know it has to be terrifying to be moving to another state and with strangers. It is good that we are getting to talk to her a lot and visit a few times before we meet. This will her more chance to work with her therapist to adjust to the idea of moving and joining a new family.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Mr. Slow Pants


The past week have been more drama with our agency. I am not even going to get into it. It all comes down to contracts and how much money they will get paid. I am trying not to think about it. It is not worth getting worked up until I Get a final contract.

With the recommendation of our attachment therapist, we are strongly considering homeschooling Sweetie.I have a meeting with a friend on Tuesday to discuss her doing this for us. She is already homeschooling her 12 year old son. So this could work really well.

We had our second call with Sweetie tonight. We were on the phone almost an hour. She was talking about clothes, shoes and pets and how she always wanted a turtle that she could call Mr. Slow Pants. She is quite funny. She said that she knows that she should not move so fast but she really wants to come visit us the next school break. (that is Memorial Day Weekend). I said we were OK with that. I asked her if she wanted us to come visit first and she does. She said in 4 weeks. Which is Mother's Day Weekend! She wants us to bring the dogs.
The thing she said that made me almost loose it was when she said that we seem like the family she has always dreamed of. I told her that we really want to be that family and will work hard to be it!

She was very talkative tonight, she talked about how she has moved so many times, she just doesn't care anymore. She talked about her sister who is still a Missing Child, she talked about how she needs to be pushed to clean her room. But she can be persuaded to do chores for money.

She was very interactive in our conversation, if we would both talk at same time, she was would apologize and say you go ahead. She is working very hard on her manners. She talked about when she has a bad day needing to cool off and how she has learned to do that.

It was a good conversation and we can't wait for the next one!!!

Sunday, April 08, 2012

First Call


We had our first call with Sweetie this evening! Actually, just as I was calling them, she called us! I answered the phone and there she was! I was so excited! We talked for about 30 minutes, during the time she was always very polite, saying Ma'am when she couldn't hear me talk. During this conversation we learned the following about her:
She loves dogs and wants a big dog someday like a Lab or German Shepard
Her Favorite Artist is Adele
She can sing well
She likes musical instruments ( but not any you blow) she mentioned the drums,guitar
She likes to go horseback riding
Her favorite color is Lime Green
Her favorite subject in School is Math
Her Favorite Foods are French Fries and Fruit
She Dislikes Meatloaf, Cabbage and Brussel Sprouts
She likes to run
She likes to go swimming
She has a real sweet personality on the phone and is very confident. 
I said to her that I heard she was a very special young lady and she answered with "Yes I am!"
To which I responded that we were a special family!  I love the confidence...it is very like my own! 

We are very excited to talk more with her and her foster mom. Her foster mom has been fabulous! I really like her and I look forward to developing a friendship with her. 

On another note we added a loft bed to Sweetie's room. It looks so cool in there!!! I love to be in there. It is so peaceful and just feels good to be in there! I hope she likes it as much as I do!

We sent her a care package with photos of us, the dogs, the house. As well as a journal with pen, a Scentsy stuffed animal that smells like lavender, a butterfly like the ones hanging in her room and a card. 

It is so appropriate for us to have our first call on Easter. It is a new beginning for her and us. Out of something truly devastating comes beauty and hope. 

Love this song... It Might Be Hope by Sara Groves

Thursday, April 05, 2012

Big Things Coming

I am always amazed at how blessed I am by my friends. Today because of one of my dearest friends I am able to write this while sitting of the balcony of the Grand Floridian at Disney World overlooking a lake and Cinderella's Castle. The birds are singing and it is the beginning of a gorgeous day. Everything has been so busy the sat couple weeks. My brother, sister n law and Taylor came to visit , followed by my parents visiting and now I have been whisked away to dIsney for a whirlwind trip that has so far been magical! Last evening we had dinner at TRex followed by taking K & N to Cirque du Soliel, La Nouba. It was amazing! To watch N was worth every cent of the tickets. To see a child who normal keeps her emotions subdued and doesn't allow herself to just enjoy things, just let go and laugh and point and just be amazed was the highlight of my night!! If I were a softy like why wonderful friend K, I would have cried...but this girl kept her emotions in check. We have had so much going on with the adoption but I have no time to write about it, so I will take advantage of my early morning quite to do so.As in every other part of our journey here have been a few bumps, but luckily we were able to quickly over come them. We are dealing with what is known as the Interstate Compact Act. This is where the 2 states involved in the adoption battle out what benefits the child will receive once we take placement. This includes a monthly subsidy, medical and psychological coverage, lawyer fees, post placement visits, finalization fees, ect. We had a large conference call Monday with everyone involved, we were able to discuss our future daughters needs specifically and work on a start to a visitation schedule.we all agree the getting her here several weeks before school starts is in her best interest. We had to fill out a bunch more paperwork and receive 5 more references for Florida. Our first talk by phone with her will be this Sunday. Then our first meeting will be May 18th weekend. We have a lot to be excited about coming up. I wonder about her all the time. As I walk through Disney I think that next time I am here she will be with me. What will she like? Will she think it is corny to get pixie dust sprinkled on her hair and arms? Will she love the Miss Mismatch Store? Will she hold my hand and skip through Disney or ride piggy back?The sun is rising on what is going to be another truly amazing day here at Disney. I will write again after our phone call Sunday!