Saturday, March 26, 2011

Finger Prints

(not our fingerprints :)

We went uptown to the sheriff's department to get our finger prints taken for our FBI and SBI background checks. That was pretty neat. I was thinking I was going to have them taklen with ink and paper. Instead they now have a machine that takes them digitally. Pretty cool! We got right in and out which was nice.
They are now being sent over to Children's Home Society for processing.

We are having a great visit with my parents. Of course ma and I are doing a bit of shopping therapy!
Which is always fun. We are going over to Ikea today to look at bed room furniture. So I can get an idea of what we will have in Her room :)

We start our M.A.P.P. training next Saturday! It is good that things are just going along without any huge breaks so far.

Ok off to do more shopping :)

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Cris' Million Question Profile

Phew, we are all done with Cris' questionnaire! That was rough. They ask the same questions several times. I understand they are looking for consistantcy but boy does it make it super long. The good thing is Cris and I are very aligned in our philosophies on how we want to raise the child. Which is great.
My parents are coming to visit this week and then we start our M.A.P.P. training the next week! Yea!!!
I am super excited about that! We go Friday for our finger printing also. So things are moving right along.
Class will be over May 14th, then it will be time for our home study. And then time to start meeting the kids :)
We are still planning on meeting Gabbrilla. And any other girls that they think may be a good fit for us.

Not much else to write tonight!

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Gabbrilla video

I have been talking with my parents alot and they have alot of advice and experiences to share to bring light to all sides of our decision. On the same day they posted a  video of Gabbrilla which I will attach a link to.
From the video we found out she is Hondorian and she has been living with her aunt who has older children.
She is very smart and talkative.And she wants dogs. She does have an attachment to her biological family. Cris and I both have questions about this for our social worker. Unfortuately we may not get answers until our classes are over in May and our back ground check clears. Cris and I agree that if her parents are in the US and have contact that this will not be the child for us. But if they are out of the country we do not have an issue if she knows her family.

She is still in the picture, but we will be continuing our search as well.
We have committed to each other that if either one of us has a bad feeling about any child  that we will tell each other and that we will respect that and not go with that child.
We are going to be in complete agreement on our choice.

Here is Gabbrilla's video.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Maybe someone older

I don't know why, but since the beginning of my search for a child I have been drawn to the girls who are around 12 years olds. Cris had orginally wanted a younger child but as soon as I showed him Gabbrilla, he was instantly interested.. She is not a young child...she is 12! Here is her profile

Gabbrilla is an attractive and spirited young lady with aspirations of becoming a teacher or doctor when she grows up. She is likable, polite, helpful, and has an outgoing personality. She desires constant interaction with others and offers lots of advice. She does well academically and performs at grade level in school. Her favorite subject is spelling and she looks forward to recess time as well. Favorite pastime activities include watching Dukes of Hazard, Dr. Quinn, and The Waltons with her foster parents. She also enjoys roller skating, drawing, and wants to learn to cook.

Gabbrilla has a strong desire for a family and is flexible about what her ideal family might be like. Her wishes are to have a female sibling close in age and a puppy, but she is not locked into those ideas. Gabbrilla is very impressionable and needs the love and guidance of a strong single- or two-parent family. She desires to explore and maintain her cultural identity and needs a family willing to walk with her in that quest. Religion is important and she hopes to continue participation in church activities.

About the only thing is we don't have is a sibling for her. Other than that we may be a good match! This is just the first child we are interested we shall see how it goes.

I have emailed our social worker to get more info.

I can't wait to learn more.

Super Excited :o)

Friday, March 11, 2011

Like my Dad

I may look like my mother but the rest of me is all Dad. I wrote in my last blog about how fabulous my Mom is, and she really is. But the true hero of my life story would have to be my dad. The first thing I can say about my father is he is a fabulous father to me as an adult. He is someone I can call when I need to make a decision and he will listen and he will weigh options with me and then let me decide. I am sure it is hard at times to do it... even when he sees me making a stupid decision, like getting married too young. But he let me make my own decisions. He has always led by example to be hard working and taught us that nothing in life is just handed to you, you need to earn everything. I believe this is why my brother and I are bother very successful in our professional endeavours. He has always put Den and I first, even if it didn't seem like it at the time. My dad did what he had to in order to provide us with the best life he could. Sometimes that meant working 16 hour shifts with an hour plus commute each way. How hard it must have been to be in his twenties and deal with the hot mess that was my biological mother. I had a rough time with this as a young adult, but I totally get it now. Sometimes doing the right thing is not the easy thing. The easy thing would have been to just walk away completely. Instead he did the right thing and protected Den and I by removing us from a bad situation. How many men would do that? I think of all the guys I know and how they acted when they were in their late 20's...they really acted the same as they did when they were 16. But not my dad, my dad is a Man. A man who has put his family first.
I am very fortunate to have my fathers intelligence. I can only imagine what he could have done in life if he had not had to become a prison guard to provide for Den and I. He is one of the smartest men I know. I am often told how smart I am by other people. I am very "common sense" smart. Quick Witted like my dad. And my fabulous self esteem came from him too. To give an example of this. In response to my blog entry yesterday he says he is perfect 100% of the time. :o)
My dad was not always good at being affectionate when we were children but he was the kind of man who would drive hours in a snow storm on Christmas Eve to get me my first computer (a Commadore 64). And make sure that I had my world traveler cabbage patch kid from Spain. And that Den had his Voltron Toy that cost $80 just to have Den turn around and trade it for some garbage pail kids. So now after retiring from being a prison guard he is a big softy. I am grateful for my relationship with him. I miss him since he is NY and I am in NC, but we talk often. I can't wait for our daughter to meet her grandfather...aka PaPa to all the grand kids. He is a great grandfather.... the kind that plays with Taylor and her little miniature dogs and buys her chocolate. I look forward to the family trips that we will take up to NC so Papa can teach "Her" to fish like he has all the other grandchildren.
So in closing, my Pop Rocks.... Period!

Thursday, March 10, 2011

It takes a community to raise a child

Thanks to Karolyn,Karen & Kristin being in contact with me I have had a chance to put some deep thought into where I came from and how I got to be who I am... and that is one Stellar person! Lord only knows where this huge ego of mine came from. Many who know me have heard me refer to myself as Perfection Supersized. And luckily I feel like that 90% of the time. Noone can be perfect 100% :o)

There are so many people that have had their hands in molding who I am as a person. I was talking with my brother Den today about this and he was saying how most people only have their parents to do this. We are lucky enough to have so many people who have cared for us and impacted our lives.

Where so many people would use this as an excuse to be a less than ideal person, Den and I have both flourished and grown to be pretty good people. At least that is what we think.

I am so glad to be able to talk to the Bebee girls to see how our presence in their home effected them and also to get the perspective of a family that temporarily takes care of children and then has to give them up.
Because of this I will really be able to relate to the foster family of the child that we shall adopt.
I think will they want to know this child as they grow. I am open to that. I am really open to anyone that is a loving and positive person that is already in the child's life staying there. I am hoping that continuing the bonds with these people may help keep some form of stability in "Her" life. I am so grateful to their parents for allowing Den & I to join their family temporarily. What amazing is it for people to take in children that are not their own. And how after 30 years the whole family cares enough to find us. I am truly touched by this. I always knew that we had gone to live with them, but I never really thought about what that meant until recently during this adoption process.

This whole process is so making me appreciate my Mom so much. How fabulous was she to take in my brother (at age 10) and I (at age 12), when her own 4 children were already grown. How selfless that was of her. There are not alot of women who would do that. To know that she would not just live with my dad but required that they get married before living together to provide us with a stable home is really awesome. She really did put our needs above her own, way before we became her family.  My mom really does have the most beautful heart of anyone I know. What a fabulous role model for me and for my future daughter.

It is getting late, all three pups are lying on the couch around me snoring. I think it is time I should retire to bed and do a bit of reading.
I have been communicating withe the Bebee girls today and got a cute picture. This is me at their house for my 4th birthday...

Wednesday, March 09, 2011

Things happen just how and when they should :)

As I have previously written the Adoption Agency really dives into our past. When I was 5 and my mom died my brother and I went to live with another family for a period of time. I don't remember a lot about that time. I remember so little about that time in  my life. I do remember being there and playing with the youngest daughter Karolyn and I remember 2 older sisters who fought a lot like all sisters do. I did not remember their last name.
Today when I got home I had a message waiting in my in box on face book. It was the youngest sister who I played with. What a wonderful thing face book is. It allows for so many reunions. It is amazing how it is now that they have tracked me down. Just when I am really having to explore my past. I look forward to talking to her and her sister who has also friended me on Face Book.
I am sure I will have more to write about this in the days to come.

Thursday, March 03, 2011

Busy, Busy and More Busy

So, I am almost done with my 35 pages of questions. They definitely get into to every little detail of your life, past and present. Cris is in Ecuador until Monday. Once he is back we need to get working on his. That will be fun :)
I finished the rough draft of the adoption profile scrapbook. I am pretty happy with it. It needs some tweaking but it is looking good.
I did it in Microsoft word. I am extremely versed at that program.  I was able to do some cool stuff with it.
The only bad thing is I can't put any of that on here because of the format. Sorry :)

I had a nice dinner with my friend Kasia tonight. I love that girl! She has the biggest heart and she is the kind of mom I want to be. She really has her stuff together and her daughter Kelsey is awesome because of it. I am so fortunate to have some really awesome friends. I have really spent a lot of time thinking about the people in my life and who is a positive and who is a negative. I am at a point in my life where I only have room for positive. I have to consider who and what will be best for our child. It is amazing how quickly the mothering instinct kicks in. I know I am not a parent yet, but I am already willing to put the child's needs first. I have made so many decisions differently because of it. It is amazing how differently decisions are made when they are made with an unselfish heart. Cris & I were going to finally take our honeymoon in September cruising from Puerto Rico to St. Thomas, St. Marteen, St. Martin, St. Lucia and Barbados.  However the trip became very costly and it looks as if we may be parents by summer so we decided it would be best to cancel. If we do have "Her" by September it would be so hurtful to "Her" if we were to leave her.
Since we would be losing our deposit we decided to use it on a long weekend over memorial day to go to the Bahamas. It may not be the honeymoon we dreamed of but it made me feel so much better once we made the decision. So that would be our first Selfless act as parents.

I walk through stores and see so many cute things I want to buy for "Her", but not knowing how old she will be I hold off. It will be so hard not to spoil "Her" when she first comes. I will have of this built up inside me.
I find myself thinking that this coming Halloween we will be looking at costumes and about celebrating our first Christmas together. Will she be young enough to believe in Santa? And how awesome it will be to experience the holidays as a family! What will she want to call us Mommy & Daddy, Jenny & Cris? What other things could she call us? Will she like my cooking? While she like to read to at night, does she need a nightlight. What color will her eyes be, her hair? The stream of thought is so hard to turn off.  However, it is the end of a very busy week and I need to go to bed and sleep :)