MAKING OUR FAMILY: Getting There

Thursday, January 01, 2015

Getting There

Posted by JennyV at 1/01/2015 10:26:00 PM

This time last year we had reached the lowest point in our family. We were completely broken. Sweetie was refusing to see us. As I blogged about earlier this year I had picked a word for the year, and that word was Wholeness. Wholeness for our girl, that she could heal enough to accept our love and accept being part of our family. Little did I know what wholeness would look like for our family. Sweetie's journey to wholeness is still in progress. She has had such amazing growth this year. It has been full of ups and downs. And we still do not know if she will ever be able to come home permanently. But we love her and will continue to get her what ever help we can to continue to put the pieces of her heart back together. The last week has been a whirlwind. Sweetie came home for a few days for Christmas. Christmas day was tough but the rest of her visit was pretty good. Better than I thought it would go. She is doing well in her program and is on track for stepping down to a specialized therapeutic home. This home will simulate our family dynamic. It will be interesting to see how she does there.

This week we helped set our expecting mother (EM) and her 5 year old son up with a place of their own, allowing them a fresh start. It has been awesome getting to know her. She is super sweet. I am really hoping that she will keep communication with us after the baby is born. Cris and I are getting rather attached to her and her son. The generosity that we have experienced by so many has been amazing. We received enough items to furnish a small home for her. It blows me away how God continues to bless our journey. Just 3 1/2 months ago we thought it would be impossible to expand our family and now in 10 weeks we will be adding a baby. And yesterday, New Years Ever I was able to go with EM to her ultrasound yesterday and I was able to see that baby that will be our in just a few weeks.

and then I got to see that it is a ....

Our family will become whole. It is amazing how God has taken my word "Wholeness" further than anything I could have dreamed of! We are not completely whole yet, but we are getting there! And we could not have gotten to where we are without all of the love and support of so many.

We have been incredibly blessed with amazing friendship this year.

For 2015 my word will be Joy. I can not wait to see what this year has in store for us!

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The Road Home...

01/06/2011- Submitted Application to CHS
02/19/2011- First Meeting with Social Worker- filled out initial paperwork
03/26/2011- Finger Printing
04/01/2011- 05/014/2011- MAPP Training
04/09/2011- Assigned 2nd Social Worker
04/23/2011- Background Checks Cleared
04/26/2011- Home Visit
05/02/2011- Fire Inspection
05/03/2011- Had to get Manual Finger Prints because electronic ones I was advised to get done are only good for 30 days
05/08/2011- Our Profiles Turned in to Social Worker
05/23/2011- References Done
06/06/2011- Per Social Worker CHS is processing all our paperwork (can take up to 50 days for approval)
06/07/2011- Marriage Certificate and Divorce Decrees mailed to Greensboro
06/08/2011- Discipline Agreement Signed and Mailed in
06/16/2011- Photo Profiles mailed to Greensboro
06/24.2011- Mailed in Diplomas to Greensboro
07/08/2011- Home Visit from social worker- requesting I see therapist
07/19/2011- Start therapy
08/02/2011- Assigned 3^rd Social Worker
08/09/2011- physicals/tb test
08/13/2011- met new Social Worker - another Home Visit for Foster Home Application
08/29/2011- psychological testing, couples therapy and released from therapy (therapist saying she can not find anything wrong)
09/16/2011- psychological reports mailed in.
10/05/2011- 12 Skills worksheet filled out and turned in
10/06/2011- Vet Records submitted
10/8/2011- received a call telling us they have children that they think we will be perfect parents for ( but 3 boys).
10/25/2011- another Home Visit. Signed our foster home application. Told our paperwork should be sent up to the committee in about a week. Gave her copies of reference letters that had previously been sent to old social worker
11/05/2011 Received an email that we need another Home Visit to finalize paperwork.
11/10/2011 Home Study sent from our social worker to her supervisor for approval (it then comes to us for approval then the review committee)
11/20/2011 Contact with family about adopting Baby L :) . Email to Social Worker about expediting our foster license
11/22/2011 Second Fire Inspection (first one expired)
11/23/2011 told needed to replace marriage license and divorce decrees ( ordered from NY State and awaiting delivery) Mike sent me his original and I ordered a copy for him, and we had one last original of marriage certificate.
12/06/2011- Should receive final divorce decree today.
12/23/2012- CHS Approved Home Studdy (PPA)
02/24/2012- Inquiry sent to Children Awaiting Parents about Sweetie & her Sister in Florida
02/28/2012- Foster License Arrived
03/06/2012- Paperwork filled out Florida paperwork to proceed with matching
03/19/13- Match Staffing Scheduled and we were approved to be a match for Sweetie
04/08/2012- First Phone Call
05/11/2012- 05/13/2012- First Meeting In Florida
06/08/2012- 06/17/2012 Trip to Disney and First visit to NC for Sweetie
07/14/2012- Sweetie Moved In!
07/26/2012- Sweetie mailed in her consent to be adopted
09/14-09/26/2012- Sweetie hospitalized
10/06/2012- ADOPTION FINALIZED!! Sweetie is legally our daughter
12/24/2012- Sweetie’s Birth Certificate with us listed as parents arrived
02/22/2013- Sweetie admitted to PRTF
08/22/2013-Sweetie discharged from PRTF
10/30/2013- Sweetie Hospitalized 2nd time
11/11/2013- Sweetie admitted to different PRTF
05/30/2014- Sweetie discharged from 2nd PRTF & started Day Treatment
07/3/14 -07/18/14-Sweetie Hospitalized for 3rd time
07/18/14-08/10/2014 - Sweetie in temporary group home
08/10/2014-Sweetie admitted to 3rd PRTF
10/05/2014- Child #2 -Matched with birth mom- she is 4 months pregnant.
10/05/2014 fundraising started, lawyer and home study agencies secured.
10/22/2014- first fundraising goal of $2000 raised by doing envelope fundraiser and selling my watercolor paintings
10/22/2014- first meeting with adoption lawyer- retainer paid
10/24/14- Background checks completed
10/25/2014- physicals complete
11/07/2014- home study paperwork mailed to Triangle Adoption Services. (Home study paid
11/14/14 Homestudy paperwork sent in to agency
11/19/14 First call with Birth Mom :)
11/25/15- Social Worker interviewed Sweetie
12/03/14- First email communication with Birth Mom
12/06/14- Met Birth Mom and her family
12/11/2014- Home Study Visit
12/17/14- 2nd Home Study Visit & visit with baby's mom
12/31/14- Ultrasound to find out it is a BOY! Baby Spartacus!
01/21/15- Birth mom signs initial legal paperwork, legal father signs consent form for adoption
01/22/15- Home Study Approved
01/26/15- Cherokee Indian Tribe consented to adoption
03/09/15- Baby Spartacus is born
03/10/15- Bio mom relinquished rights
03/16/15- Bio father served to request relinquishment.
04/21/15- Bio father contest adoption
6/12/15- Spartacus meets his birth brother on mom's side. :)
06/17/15- Court hearing for necessity of birth father's consent.
07/03/15- Motion Granted that father's consent not required.
07/21/15- Home Study Agency sent Court Report in so adoption can be finalized.
08/04/15- Spartacus' adoption finalized!!!!!
08/21/15- Sweetie transitioned to IAFT
06/08/16- Sweetie transitioned to TFC- she changes her plan to reunification with birth family when 18 (1.5 years from now)09/30/16- Sweetie transferred to another placement due to behavioral issues. It is decided, there will be no reunification with our family. Her plan is to stay in TFC as long as possible and then transition into living.
04/19/2017- Sweetie transferred to another placement due to behavioral issues. Wrap Around Services Started
06/21/2017- Sweetie started with Youth Villages Life Set Program
08/14/2017- Youth Villages Life Set Program terminated due to Sweetie refusing to work the program
09/20/2017- Wrap Around Services Terminated due to Sweetie refusing to work the program.
03/17/2018 Sweetie turns 18.

MAKING OUR FAMILY

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Thursday, January 01, 2015

Getting There

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